VACCINATION STATION

VACCINATION STATION

Happy Small Lights Friday, everyone! I hope everyone is staying cool in the heat, staying dry in the rain, and staying away from doom-scrolling through recent events. There’s been a lot going on in the world this week, and it’s hard to wrap my head around it sometimes. I thought we could use our Small Lights Friday to talk about one piece of big news that affects all of us, and it is very exciting news!

THE SHOT HEARD ROUND THE WORLD

The Pfizer vaccine has officially cleared FDA approval, and not a moment too soon. With schools opening back up (and many across the country already open), it is more important than ever to get vaccinated to protect yourself and your loved ones from the Delta variant. Children under 12 are still not eligible to receive their dose, which means we need to ensure we are all doing our part, collectively, for each other. 

I know there is a lot of vaccine hesitancy. I certainly was not immune to it  – when the last administration was championing their Operation: Warp Speed, I turned to my husband and said, “I am not taking a Star Trek vaccine.” In my own defense, our former president did stare directly at a solar eclipse, so my weariness over his confidence was justified. Just look at what he tweeted after President Biden took office: 

Made ya look

All jokes aside, (wait – not all jokes – don’t hold me to this), we have all collectively faced an almost insurmountable challenge for the past 17 months. So why now, with a light at the end of this dreadful tunnel, are we seeing such intense backlash against a life saving vaccine?

If you’re reading this article in hopes that I am going to tear into anti-vaxxers, I am sorry to disappoint. My goal today is to help anyone who is still feeling hesitant to feel more comfortable about it. This is a literal life and death situation; it makes sense to be afraid. It does, however, seem that some of us are afraid of the wrong thing. Whether it’s due to disinformation, a lack of information, or just plain stubbornness, it’s time to spit facts.

FACT SPIT

Here are some common myths, accompanied by the truth, straight from the CDC:

Are we gonna be microchipped?

If I’m being honest, I started with this myth because it’s the one I’m most disappointed in. Imagine being able to Venmo your friends with a simple shoulder bump? Missed opportunity.

What about shedding? I thought that was reserved for dogs?

I don’t have a funny quip for this one. I didn’t even know shedding was a real thing, so I learned something today, too!

What about the timeline? How did we get a safe vaccine so fast?

You can find a detailed answer here, but the short answer is that we didn’t speed up the science, we cut through the red tape of bureaucracy. My only regret is that we didn’t have Fauci symbolically cut a large red ribbon with oversized scissors. Another missed opportunity.*

*I would like to take this moment to advise my readers I spent the better part of an hour in Microsoft paint trying to get a pair of large scissors into Fauci’s hands, but it was not meant to be.

What about altering our DNA (What I like to call the Spiderman Initiative)?

God, that’s so boring.

Don’t believe the CDC? Listen, I don’t blame you. The messaging coming out of the CDC has changed frequently as we learn more about this virus. In my personal opinion, I believe the CDC has been doing the best they can for the given situation. Of course, it has not been perfect, but I can forgive imperfection as long as we’re working towards a solution, and not contributing to the problem.

But hey, if the CDC has lost all credibility with you, I have something even better. Or, maybe I should say, John Oliver and Catherine O’Hara have something better. Check this out: 

Not a fan of O’Hara? First of all, change your opinion. Secondly, maybe John Cena would be a better fit!

You can go to the website John Oliver created, The True True Truth, to see if there’s another celebrity on there who resonates with you more! (Paul Rudd has one – you know you wanna watch Paul Rudd). Thanks, John Oliver!

I got my Moderna shot as soon as I was eligible. My side effects were mild; I was very tired and had some soreness on my arm, but that was it. I’m not magnetic (damn it), my DNA has not been altered (damn it), and I’m not microchipped (I hope my friends take cash). 

IS THERE ANTIBODY OUT THERE

Here’s the thing: People in other countries are desperately trying to get the vaccine, and here in America, we are letting it go to waste. There are other people on this planet who see us as some of the luckiest people in the world. When it comes to vaccine availability, we kind of are. Let’s not take it for granted. Let’s protect our loved ones and get the shot.

If, at this point, you’re not getting the vaccine simply because you don’t like being told what to do, I would recommend the following: Never order takeout, never request the wardrobe attendant to get you a smaller pant size, never call a plumber to fix your leaky pipes, and never ask your children to clean their rooms. Don’t go to the hospital for help when your lungs are filling with fluid and you start to choke from the inside. After all, why should anyone be told what to do? Why should you bother getting a free, life saving vaccine when the child suffocating to death alone in the hospital isn’t even your kid? Has the world gone crazy? These are your freedoms! You fought for them, right? Well, likely not, considering the military requires so many vaccinations I can confidently deduce most anti-vaxxers have never served.

…Okay, maybe I am tearing into anti-vaxxers a little bit.

Get the facts. Get the shot. Get out and dance. In that order.

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